I have yet to give a speech or have a meeting where somebody doesn't ask me “The millennial question”。 

What's the millennial question?

Apparently, millennials are the generation, which is a group of people who were born approximately 1984 and after...are tough to manage.

And they're accused of being entitled and narcissistic ,self interested, unfocused,lazy...But entitled is the big one. 

And because they confound leadership so much.

What's happening is leaders are asking the millennials, “what do you want?”

And millennials are saying “we want to work in a place with purpose.

Love that.” “ we want to make an impact.”You know, whatever that means. “we want free food and bean bags.”

And so somebody articulates some sort of purpose.There's lots of free food, and there's bean bags, and yet for some reason, they are still not happy, and that's because there's a missing piece.

What I've learned is that there I can break it down into four pieces right?There are four four things, four characteristics. 

One is parenting.

The other one is a technology.

The third is impatience,

 and the fourth is environment.

The generation that we call the millennials too many of them grew up...Um, subject to not my words.

Failed parenting strategies(/ˈstrætədʒiz/策略), where, for example, they were told that they were special all the time.

They were told that they could have anything they want in life.

Just because they want it, some of them got into honors （/ˈɑːnərz/

）classes, not because they deserved it, but because their parents complained .And some of them got “ A”s not because they earned them, but because the teachers didn't want to deal with the parents, some kids got participation(/pɑːrˌtɪsɪˈpeɪʃ(ə)n/参与) Metals/ˈmetlz/, you've got a medal for coming in the last ，right？

Which the science we know is pretty clear, which is it devalues（降低价值/ˌdiːˈvæljuː/） the metal and the reward for those who actually work hard，and that actually makes the person who comes in last feel embarrassed(/ ɪmˈbærəst/尴尬) because they know they didn't deserve it，so that makes them feel worse, right?

So you take this group of people and they graduate school, and they get a job and the thrust into the real world.And in an instant they find out they're not special.

Their moms can't get them a promotion（/prəˈmoʊʃ(ə)n/ 促进） that you get nothing for  coming in last，and by the way, you can't just have it because you want it.And in an instant their entire self -images(/ˌself ˈɪmɪdʒ/自我形象) shattered （/ˈʃætərd/破碎）.

And so you have an entire generation that's growing up with lower self esteem

than previous generations.

The other problem to compound it is, we're growing up in a Facebook, Instagram world.In other words, we're good at putting filters on things.We're good at showing people that life is amazing even though I'm depressed .

And so everybody sounds tough, and everybody sounds like they got it all figured out.And the reality is: there's very little toughness,

and most people don't have it figured out.

And so when the more senior people say, what should we do?

They sound like this is what you got at it，and they have no clue， right?

So you have an entire generation growing up with lower self esteem and previous generations, right?

Through no fault of their own,through no fault of their own,right?

They were dealt a bad hand.

Now, let's add in technology.

We know that engagement with social media and our cell phones releases a chemical called dopamine.

That's why, when you get a text feels good, right?

So you know, we've all had it when you're feeling a little bit down or feeling a bit lonely, and so you send out 10 text to 10 friends you know ,hi.hi.hi.hi.hi.Cause it feels good when you get a response.

It’s why we count the likes. It's why we go back 10 times to see if ...and if it's going, if our my Instagram is growing slower, I would...did I do something wrong?Do they not like me anymore? Right?

The the trauma（/ˈtrɔːmə/心理创伤）for young kids to be unfriended, right?

Because we know when you get it, you get a hit of dopamine, which feels good. It's why we like it.It's why we keep going back to it.

Dopamine is the exact same chemical that makes us feel good when we smoke,

when we drink.And when we gamble ...In other words, it's highly highly addictive(/əˈdɪktɪv/成瘾).

We we have age restrictions on smoking, gambling and alcohol（/ˈælkəhɔːl/）, and we have no age restrictions on social media and cell phones, which is the equivalent of the opening up the liquor （/ˈlɪkər/烈性酒）cabinet and saying to our teenagers, hey, by the way, this adolescence thing, if it gets you down. 

But that's basically what's happening.

That's basically what's happening, right?

That's basically what happened.You have an entire generation

 that has access to an addictive numbing chemical called dopamine,through social media and cell phones as they're going through the high stress of adolescence.

Why is this important?

Almost every alcoholic/ˌælkəˈhɑːlɪk/ discovered alcohol when they were teenagers.When we're very, very young, the only approval /əˈpruːv(ə)l/we need is the approval of our parents.And as we go through adolescence, we make this transition/trænˈzɪʃ(ə)n/ where we now need the approval of our peers .

Very frustrating/ˈfrʌstreɪtɪŋ/ for our parents.

Very important for us that allows us to acculturate outside of our immediate

families into the broader tribe, right?