知名华裔Youtuber Steven He在全球拥有超过450万的粉丝。在他自导自演的视频里,他一人分饰多角,夸张演绎亚裔家庭的刻板印象——学习内卷、爱攀比、要求高等等。他的经典粤式口音英语十分魔性,成就了经典梗——Emotional Damage。
(转载来源:油管)
亚裔父母怎么攀比的(第一集)
How Asian Parents Flex(Episode 1)
场景:两个邻居在门口见面闲聊
Dad A:北京玉米代言人,儿子是Youtuber
Dad B:数据科学家,儿子是神经外科医生
(PS:以下口语存在语法错误,这是博主的标志性风格)
Dad A:(热情)Oh, Hello! You are my new neighbor. You just move in?
Dad B: Yes, we just move in for my son's new job.
Dad A:(好奇)Oh, good! What job?
Dad B:(平淡)Neurosurgeon (/ˈnʊroʊsɜ:rdʒən/神经外科医生).
Dad A:(开始嫉妒)Nice. How old your son?
Dad B:(离谱)Nine.
Dad A:(更加嫉妒)Nice, very impressive. You from China?
Dad B: Shenzhen.
Dad A: Shenzhen? Me too. Where Shenzhen?
Dad B: I am from uptown.
Dad A:(阴阳怪气)Oh uptown? So comfortable. I'm from downtown. Downtown for tough people. You know?(开始离谱)When I went to school, I had to walk 20 miles.
Dad B:(开始攀比上学艰难)I had to climb mountain to get to school lar.
Dad A:(离谱)I had to walk to fire.
Dad B:(离谱)I fly to school.
Dad A:(离谱)Every morning I had to fight two lions.
Dad B:(挑衅)Two lions?? Try fighting sharks!
Dad A:(离谱)I fought a tyrannosaurus(/taɪˌrænəˈsɔ:rəs/霸王龙) with nun chucks(双截棍).
Dad B:(目瞪口呆)Your tyrannosaurus had nun chucks?(开始攀比身体伤病)I have a scar from when I lost my elbow.
Dad A: I had back surgery from carrying Steven's Youtube channel.(转移话题)What you do?
Dad B:(碾压)I am a data scientist. Triple Phd from Harvard.(离谱)I invented parallel parking. And I held Nasa land the paper clipp on the sun.
Dad A: What the hell does that do?
Dad B: How about you?
Dad A:(自豪)I am the face of Beijing corn.
Dad B:(不信,嘲笑)Hahahaha.(拿出罐头,笑容凝固)
Dad A:(自豪)Oh, you are fan?
Dad B:(嘴硬)Oh no. I only bought it 20% off.
Dad A: 20% off? I give you coupon, buy one get one free.
Dad B:(开始攀比省钱)Oh no. when I shop, everything half price.
Dad A:(抱着大米)That's 25 pound rice for two cents.
Dad B:(拿出ipad)I bought this, returned it. Come back week later, open box discount.
Dad A:(开始攀比贫穷)I only have one jacket.
Dad B: I don't even have a dish washer.
Dad A:(质疑)What the hell is a dish washer? (潜台词:你是Asian吗?)
Dad B:(突然意识到洗碗机不是亚裔风格)I don't know. It's expensive dry rack. Why the hell everybody put the dry rack on the sink? I don't know lar.(转移话题)Hey! Why you have a camera filming you?
Dad A: Oh, my son. Such a failure. He's an actor, make the stupid video on youtube.
Dad B:(开始攀比笨蛋儿子)No lar. My son, such a failure. He can't even cook rice.
Dad A:(突然关怀)
Dad B:(开始哭泣)
Dad A:(关怀)Are you OK?
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